The Worst Crime

If you couldn’t tell, this is off of, the crime of forgetting, which happened to be by my awesome writer sister, Jinx.

The Worst Crime

“Daddy, why are you so busy?” One four year old girl asked.

Her twin then inquired, “And how come you can’t play with us anymore?”

     He sighed, “Because I have to make something called a funeral.”

     “What’s that?” They asked asked in unison.

     Daddy fought back tears as he said, “It means you won’t see Mommy again for a long time.

     “How long?”

     “Until we die.”

     Joy and Renea looked sad at this. But if they could really understand what this meant, they would be weeping.

“Hey Buddy? What do you want?” The dirty bartender asked.

“Huh?”

“Well most people come to a bar cause they want something to drink.”

Over the conversing in the bar, his barely audible reply was, “You pick, just make it strong enough for me to forget about my painful      memories.”

“And what memories would those be?”

He painfully suspired before answering, “He committed the worst crime; taking a loved one.”

“Sir, I believe we’ve found the man who killed your wife,” The police man said, “He was drunk during the accident.

     “Take him away, I can’t look at him!” He sobbed

The streetlights flashed across his face, as he raced home. His thoughts raced with him.

What was the man I have grown to hate going through when he hit her? Maybe all he could do was drown his pains in booze. Like me. Maybe he recently hit the bottle because he was hurt. Like I am hurt. Maybe when he hit the random girl on the street, he never saw her.

Ripping him from his thoughts, was the sudden pain of his legs being crushed. All he could see was the wreck that used to be his car. The smell of spilled gasoline drifted to his nostrils. But worse than all of these senses combined, was the  hideous thud of metal hitting human.

      So maybe there are crimes worse than taking a loved one, and now he has commited both of them. They’re called the crime of forgetting and the crime of repeating.

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About pianolover1114

I am a 13(&1/2) year old, music making, jiujitsu attempting boy, who is currently dabbling in writing. I have been playing piano for about a year and have just a little while ago exploded in doing piano with sheet music. I have also exploded in doing boogie woogie and jazz, whithout sheet music. I started taking piano lessons about 3 months ago with a guy who plays professionally without sheet music. (His name is Matthew ball) Youtube search my name if you don't believe me. I am also pretty good at harmonica, terrible at guitar :P and okay at voice. But more importantly, (At least, for this blogs purpose) I like to write. I have always wanted to write books, since I was 7. I haven't really written much until one incident about 5 months ago. We had recently moved and i was upset about something, Don't ask me what, I don't remember. I sat down and wrote a little Piece called death to the betrayer. I loved it. then I was hooked on writing. Other interests include, Writing music, Playing music, Jiujitsu, snowboarding, reading and just hanging out. I am second oldest out of 7 in a very strong christian family. out of everything i mentioned in the last 3 paragraphs, the most important thing is that I personally know and love Jesus Christ, and that he personally knows and loves me. Thankyou for reading my work, please tell me what you think. =)

8 thoughts on “The Worst Crime

  1. PIANO LOVER, YOU ARE DEFINITELY JINX’S BROTHER, FOR YOU SHARE THE SAME TALENT. I REALLY LIKED THIS, EVEN IF IT WAS A LITTLE DARK.

    I WILL TELL YOU AS I HAVE TOLD HER, DO NOT GIVE UP WRITING, NO MATTER WHAT, FOR YOU DEFINITELY HAVE THE GIFT FOR IT.

    BLESSINGS, SWEETIE, AND TELL JINX HELLO FOR ME,

    MARANTHA

  2. swimmerchic23 says:

    I loved it. A lot. =D

  3. pianolover1114 says:

    It pretty much just happened. Originally someone murdered the main characters little sister and it would be a crime to forget about what happened to her but I changed and edited it 4 times. Any critiques? And thankyou for the wonderful comments.

  4. loustar02 says:

    Clever idea – I like the ending.

  5. Kay Camden says:

    I like how this goes from one thing to another. It really gives the impression of a tortured mind, like he’s missing moments of time.

  6. Ooo. Interesting. And a great point. We shouldn’t let our own pain control us – we may just bring the same pain on someone else.

    Since you asked for critiques – typo on “he painfully suspired”

    Good work!

  7. pattisj says:

    Such hard life lessons for one as young as yourself. Keep writing!

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