Finally! A New Piece!

Well, it’s been a long time since I’ve posted and in that time I’ve managed to have a ton of adventures and suffer horrible writers block. But now I’m finally over that and I’m back writing. This one is loosely based off of several prompts of mine and BeKindRewrite’s. =)

* * * * *

“Don’t leave me!” She gripped the hem of his shirt desperately, blind with pain. The moderator. Pain decided everything. Whether she was awake or lost in the voids of her mind. That she couldn’t see the beach, or go to the fair with Sam.

“Never.” His soft whisper brought her back to reality. Or was this the other world? The nightmare realm? Where up wasn’t always up and color swam through the skies. Where blood flowed through the rivers and giant snakes hung in even more gigantic trees, ready to drop on anyone and devour their prey. Where nothing was certain and everything reeked of pain, retching and death. She was always trapped there, with the people all dressed as jesters. But miserable ones. Ones that even with their happy faces; were only trying to attack her and any others they spotted. Nightmares caused by the drugs. So vivid. Terrifyingly real. Never ending. Inescapable.

“Am I going to die?” It was a silly question. Of course she was going to die. After seventeen years of pain, heartache, medicine, needles, doctors, loss; all of it would be gone soon. She hoped it didn’t end here. That it was just the end of this leg of the journey, and that there was something else, far better, waiting for her.

He wrestled with her question for a while, studying her. The yellowed skin, sunken cheeks and dull lifeless eyes. Why had she forced them to take her off the meds that kept all this pain away? He knew why, of course. He’d been there at least half the nights she’ woken up thrashing, shaking in fear of whatever demon had haunted her dreams that night. She’d chosen sanity, and she paid for it with pain.

She would die. Soon. He wanted to hide that from her. Telling her it would be all right in the end was so much easier. But she couldn’t take more lies. “Yes, you are.”

A gentle nod, quiet and reassured. He hadn’t lied. They had always lied before. Always thought she couldn’t handle the truth. Didn’t they see? The lies just made her more scared of death.

Death. It had always loomed over her. A block that stopped her from all the greatest parts of life. She would never marry. Never bring a child into the world. She could never grow old with someone.

“Dad?”

He looked up from a medical report. “Yeah sweetie?”

“I’m scared.”

“I know, sweetheart. I know.” He set the report down and picked her up with gentle arms, cradling her frail figure.

His arms were reassuring where his words failed. Death was coming. Faster than it did to most, but really no different, right? But the idea of being gone forever, it scared her. She didn’t want to be put in a box, to get buried. Earth covering her ugly, disease ruined face. Worms slowly eating away her coffin, and later her dead body. She pulled a face. How gross. But that was all she was destined for. A box. Covered by the earth’s crusty skin.

Claire leaned her head on her father’s chest. Her hairless head. She wore a hat of course, a knit beret her mother had made for her from soft black yarn. Along with a silver locket from her dad, it was her most treasured possession. A tiny, inaudible sigh escaped her. It was time to be a big girl. Brave and ready to face what would come.

It was tonight. The very end had finally come. Just breathing for a little longer, and she’d never have to fight again. She’d be comfortably numb.

“Hey dad?”

He glanced down at her.

“I love you.”

 

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About Jinx

I'm a writer, what else is there to tell?

8 thoughts on “Finally! A New Piece!

  1. Torrent says:

    The feeling I get is sweet and innocent…. But the pains and terrors of death! All in one. I like it! Good job! 😉

  2. WOW! That was one heck of a come back! Jinx, once again you have outdone yourself!

    I am working on one your brother sent me as a guest post and I would be most humbly honored if you also would grace me with being a guest poster on my own blog. You both are so very talented! I told him sometimes I get “pea-green with envy”, and I wasn’t lying.

    I discovered my talent too late, and now thanks to the U.S. governent, I may lose my one small chance at a life of my own, for if I do not receive my ss check next month, I lose my apartment, my lights, my phone (which means my life alert), my internet and my computer.

    Grasp and follow your dreams, sweetheart, and hold onto them with both hands, for life has a nasty way of stealing them away.

    I should know, it is happening to me right now.

    best wishes always,

    marantha

    by the way, if you don’t see me posting after the first of august, you will know i lost everything.

  3. swimmerchic23 says:

    Amazing. Completely amazing. Way to write. =)

  4. pianolover1114 says:

    Wow. That’s really good. ‘My Sister’s Keeper’ must have stuck in your head. When you read the first little bit to ne, I thought you were going in a completely different direction, to the fantasy world.

  5. scribbla says:

    Fantastic! And welcome back. The tragedy that is the passing of children is one that really, really upsets me. Very well written.

  6. How sad and poignant. This is really good, Jinx. Glad to see you back…in full force, too! Very hard for a parent to lose a child and in the process, hard to try to reassure them. You wrote that very well!

  7. Kay Camden says:

    Great description of the nightmares. I not only see it, I feel it. Loved the line about the earth’s crusty skin. As usual, there are some deeply insightful ideas here.

  8. Jinx says:

    Thank you all a bunch for your comments! I’m back home now so I’ll be posting again, hopefully. =)

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